Divine Romance

A little less than a month ago I boarded a plane, said goodbye to my people, and set up my new home in Gainesville, Georgia (which consists of some poles, stakes, a rain fly, fairy lights, a sleeping bag, and a few items of clothing). I have been here for 3 weeks now and I keep forgetting I’m not at a summer camp but at the beginning of the rest of my life. Training has been so sweet for my soul. I have learned some life-changing things, been with some life-changing people, and fallen in love with this life-changing Jesus again. 

As I fall more in love with my Creator, I am falling less in love with the American concept of church. The lights, the masses, the headlines. I am left wondering what happened to the kind of fellowship I see in the New Testament. Twelve disciples doing life and worshipping the Lord together while learning how to spread the gospel. I see the way we do life here in Gainesville and I feel so loved, known, and connected. I have church Sunday mornings here with 26 of the other Racers and it is so lovely, but what I love most is seeing what the Church looks like the rest of the week. I am not only having church Sunday morning but every single day as we come together in our tents praying before bed, debriefing a session, playing guitar around a campfire, or during volleyball tournaments and movie nights. 

The term Church has become so poorly defined. A place of worship not a people of worship. Pastoretts perform to Christianettes on the grounds of their own names and not the Fathers’. Forsaking truth because of the fear that feelings could be hurt. But what are feelings when a life is at stake and the truth is all that saves? Sometimes I forget that the disciples did not understand the sacrifice Jesus made for most of His ministry, because He hadn’t died on the cross yet. But, alas they still had faith. Faith that was so intense it changed the way they lived. Are we too scared to abandon our traditions and comfort, and that is why we never seem to experience real change?

“For the Sake of your tradition you have made void the word of God” 

-Jesus (Matthew 15:16)

Didn’t Jesus himself rebuke the kind of enslavement to tradition many “believers” in Christ uphold today? Is it not a matter of comfort, tradition, or rationality? There are no rational explanations without a relationship with the Father. I am learning that if I am ever thirsty for rationality in my walk, it likely means I am not prioritizing my relationship with Him. When you have tasted the love of Christ, you can’t ignore it, just visit it on Sundays or fall back on it when it is helpful. It becomes your life. 

I am beginning to separate myself from today’s definition of religion. I long for a day that society re-claims the idea that religion is holy and sacred. Not traditional, but sacred. Not feelings-based, but sacred. Instead of being affiliated with one of the staggering 45,000 Christian denominations, I want to be affiliated with the Christ I profess, a Christ who chose unity over division. 

I have always wanted to live for Christ, but I am now learning that I fell short so many times because I was not willing to die for him. Not only for him, but to die to myself. A relationship with Christ might mean a break up from religion. If Christ Jesus is your Savior, he is not your religion, he is your life. 

I am begging the Lord to give me uneasiness until I really wrestle with the status of what I claim my religion is. Is it religion or is it a relationship? What is in my heart when I are not standing in the congregation or the comfort of the Sunday mornings? Am I a slave to the principles we are called to follow so much that I can’t even taste his grace? Or do I use grace as an excuse to not live the way Jesus calls me to? 

Training has taught me many things and I feel as though I am at an everlasting sleepover with my sweet friends. Going to Bible and culture classes during the days, worshiping in the evenings, and playing poker at night. 

Falling in love with Jesus again has been a refining process for me, and I urge everyone to know where their romance lies. What consumes your desires? He is so in love with you, but you will never be able to experience what it is like to be fully and unconditionally loved until you let go of your traditions and turn to the cross. Turn away from the wordy proclamations from the stage and proclaim repentance. Turn away from the numbers and statistics and turn to the neighbors who need to hear good news. Turn away from the title of your allegiance and turn to the teaching of Scripture. His Word is enough. Turn away from your religion and lean into the romance He so desperately wants with His children.